DIARY OF A HALF HUMAN TIME LORD

Chapter Five

Jonathon groaned and stretched his back when it was the end of his shift.

"Yup, I agree. It's a backbreaking job but I like everyone here," Suzanne said as she followed him back to the break room.

"So do I, it's a very easy job."

"Yeah, it is. That's another good thing about it. So…what are your plans for this evening?"

"Go home, I s'pose. Relax."

"Do you have a car?"

He shook his head.

"Well, listen, I'm goin' to the pub for a drink. Come with me, relax and unwind. You don't need to go home just yet. It's only 7 o'clock. What d'ya say?"

Jonathon smiled.

"Sounds good," he said.

They went to a nearby pub for a couple of pints of bitter. The pub was crowded, noisy and the faint aroma of cigarette smoke hung in the air. They got a booth near the back and chatted awhile while they drank. Eventually, the others ended their shifts and came in after them. Jonathon laughed as he sat with Suzanne, George and Miranda. Frank, Claudia and Richard pulled a table up close to them and all of them got to know one another as they sipped their lagers and bitters. For the first time since being abandoned, Jonathon felt extremely happy and he knew that he had made the right decision to go and work at the pizza shop because now he had several friends. Real friends that accepted him for who he was and didn't know his true background. He hated not being entirely truthful with them but he knew they'd think he was insane if he told them the truth. He ended up drinking three pints before he decided to call it a night. Suzanne offered to drink him back to his apartment and he wished everyone else a good night as they gave him hugs.

"See you tomorrow, Pretty Boy. Have a good night with that kitten of yours," George said with a wink.

"You too, be sure to tell Ian I said hello," Jonathon replied.

"Oh I will. He'll be jealous of me for working with someone as gorgeous as you though," he said.

Jonathon waved at them as he and Suzanne walked out of the pub. Both of them gasped as they stepped from the warm pub out into the chilly night air.

"Well, that cured my tipsiness in a hurry," Suzanne said as they walked to her car.

"Do you need me to drive?" Jonathon asked.

"Nah, I"ll be alright. I'm not that drunk. You've had more than me," she said.

They walked up to her bright red camaro and Jonathon got into the passenger side while Suzanne climbed in behind the wheel. They shut their doors and she started the car. She looked all around before she eased her way out into traffic and drove over to Jonathon's flat.

Rose unlocked the door and looked inside Jonathon's flat after knocking on the door. She smiled when Boots ran up to her, mewing.

"Hello, you, is your owner home yet?" she said, coming inside.

She came in and reached down to pick her up. She held her close while she closed the door and locked it.

"This time I'm waitin' till he comes home," Rose said as she sat down on the sofa.

She found the remote and turned the TV on. She watched Strictly Come Dancing while she stroked Boots. A half hour later she finally heard Jonathon's voice outside the door. Her eyes widened when she heard a woman giggling with him. There was a pause and she heard Jonathon saying, "Did Boots turn the telly on by accident?" Then he heard him unlocking the door and steeled herself. She smiled when Jonathon opened the door and stared at her in shock. In his hand was a red shirt and hat and beside him was a woman dressed in the same red shirt with a pink bandanna on her head.

"Oh, who's this?" Suzanne asked Jonathon.

He sighed.

"Someone I know," he said to her.

Rose's heart hurt when she heard the annoyed tone in his voice. She watched as Jonathon pulled Suzanne away from the door and heard him bid her goodnight. She swallowed hard knowing that the next few minutes weren't going to be pretty. Finally, Jonathon stepped through the door, closed it and thrust out his hand while he walked over to her.

"My key, please," he said to her.

"Jonathon, please, just hear me out," Rose said, standing up.

"I want my key…please," Jonathon said, trying to control his temper.

Rose reached into her purse and gave it to him. Jonathon muttered his thanks and went into his bedroom while Rose followed him.

"I'm sorry I came in here without permission but I was worried about ya," she said.

"Rose," Jonathon said as he dropped the clothes on the bed and spun around to face her, "I'm fine. I'll be alright, you don't have to babysit me, okay?"

"I'm not babysitting ya. I'm just worried about ya. You won't return my calls. You weren't here when I came over earlier to give you your money."

"And you can stop that as well. I have a job now."

"You do?"

She glanced down at the shirt and saw Jack's Pizza on it. She gave him an amused grin.

"A pizza shop?"

"Yeah, what's wrong with that?" he said defensively.

Rose sighed.

"Nothing, Jonathon. Just…can't we just talk this out, please?"

"I really don't want to, Rose."

Rose laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Jonathon, you're depressed, I understand that but pushing me away isn't going to help. I love you. I really, really do and It's not because you resemble the Doctor."

"But it's him you want. It's him you tried to chase after. I'm just a consolation prize now."

Rose sighed.

"Alright, Jonathon, I admit I love him. I still do love him but he's gone now so…"

"So you might as well pick the copy and make do with him."

"No, I want to love you, Jonathon. Not love you as the Doctor, but love you as yourself."

"I don't even know who I am, Rose," he said, slumping down on his bed. "I'm not the Doctor but I'm not a completely separate person either. I really feel lost."

Rose's heart felt like it was breaking. She sat down next to him and took his hands.

"Then let me help you find yourself, Jonathon," she said gently. "You're depressed and you need people around you, don't do what the Doctor did and push people out of your life, especially me. I know this is an odd situation but we can work through it and sort it out if you'd just give us a chance and quit assuming that I will never love you as a separate person."

She squeezed his hands when she saw his eyes mist over and she neared closer to him.

"Please let me help you," she said gently. "I'm not my mum. I got angry at her earlier because she told me to stay away from you and I don't wanna do that. That's why I've been helping you. It's brilliant that you went out and got a job and you can earn your own money but I have a feeling pizza making won't earn you that much, yeah?"

"But that's your money, Rose. You should spend it on yourself and not on me."

"But I want to spend it on you, Jonathon. I have more than enough money plus Dad helps me. So now I'm helping you."

Jonathon stiffened a moment when Rose put her hand on his cheek.

"I know who you are and you're not the Doctor," she said gently as she stroked it.

"Why did he do this to you?" Jonathon murmured.

"Huh?"

He looked at her.

"Why did he kick you out the TARDIS door? After all you did to find him again, this is how he repays you? By saddling you with me?"

"No, he didn't saddle me with you," Rose said firmly. "He gave me a gift, a wonderful gift and that's why I wanna try to make this relationship work. I don't know why he did that but I know that he would never love me the way you could love me."

Jonathon stared at the floor while he thought that over. Rose's hand went up to his hair and she stroked it while she waited for him to speak. While she was waiting, Boots gamboled into the room and mewed softly. Rose smiled at her and stroked her back while she rubbed her leg.

"I love your new friend," she said to Jonathon.

A small smile formed on his face.

"Yeah, that's Boots. I found her last night sitting on some rubbish in an alley."

"Aw, you poor thing. Heh, Boots, I like that," Rose said, picking her up. "I'm glad you found her. I'm glad you found somewhere to work, you need to be around others, not sitting and moping in your flat. But that woman…is she…"

"She's a friend from work. Suzanne. She trained me and she and I went down the pub and had a few beers with her and my other friends from work."

"Good. I'm glad you have friends then. I'm glad you're not isolating yourself from everyone. Even if you don't want to be with me, at least I'll feel better knowing you have others who care about you."

Jonathon nodded. Rose rubbed his back as he continued to stare at the floor then suddenly he burst into tears and began to sob softly. Alarmed, Rose drew near to him and put her arms around him.

"Jonathon, talk to me, please," she begged.

He looked at her and Rose's heart nearly broke into when she saw the lost, empty look in his eyes.

"Am I a bad person, Rose?" he said in a small voice.

Rose rubbed her hand down his cheek.

"No, you're not, Jonathon. You're a not a bad person."

"Then why does everyone hate me?" he said. "Why does the Doctor hate me when I was trying to save the universe? Why do Jackie and Pete hate me when I've done nothing to them. Why?"

Rose felt tears coming to her eyes and she swallowed hard.

"I…I don't know, Jonathon. All I know is you're not a bad person," she said, rubbing his back.

She put her other hand on his cheek and turned his face to hers.

"Jonathon, I love you. I'm not like the Doctor or my mom or dad. I'm not your enemy. I don't hate you. I want to be with you and help you, please."

She wiped away his tear with the pad of her thumb. She hesitated a moment and then leaned in for a kiss. Jonathon hesitated and then leaned in, catching her lips and kissing them deeply. Jonathon wrapped his arms around her while they kissed each other. They stayed that way for a few minutes and then Jonathon leaned back. Rose leaned in and kissed his forehead.

"May I stay with you tonight?" she said softly.

"I have to go to work tomorrow," he said.

"What time?"

"I have to be there by eleven a.m."

"I have to be at Torchwood by nine. So let me spend the night and I'll make you breakfast in the morning before I leave. Just let me be close to you tonight and keep you company, yeah?"

Jonathon thought it over and then nodded. Rose nuzzled his cheek with her nose.

"Then let me go home and pack a small bag and I'll come right back."

Jonathon nodded and Rose kissed a tear stain on his right cheek.

"I love you, Jonathon, I mean that. I love you, not the Doctor."

Jonathon smiled at that and Rose kissed his cheek again.

"I'll be back so don't lock me out," she whispered.

"Hurry back, please."

Rose grinned at that and nodded. She gave him a couple more kisses on the cheek and squeezed his hands before she got up and hurried towards the front door.

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